A Note from Barb: March 17th, 2023

In Memory of Frank

I had the privilege of meeting Frank a few times. He confirmed our son Joe over a decade ago and we often sat near each other at Christmas Eve family services. We had passing pleasantries and we also had several lovely conversations about very serious business at St. Martin’s within the past year. Over the past year, in a very short time, we formed a deep relationship.

As a new-ish Rector’s Warden with no rector or associate rector in the church, he treated me with the utmost respect and compassion as he helped me understand some of the ways of the church and the diocese. As we are all aware, there are the protocols and expectations – and then there are the lessons that can only come from someone with a truly seasoned and wise understanding.

Frank provided an open ear for me and we began a deep relationship in a very short time. He was one of those people I felt like I knew all my life, yet, we only talked a few times. He always acknowledged me and my family with friendliness and I knew he had space in his heart for us – way before I was ever on the vestry.

Some relationships are immediate. Growing up, my grandparents lived next door and my grandfather would take me on his daily errands to the post office, to get the paper, go to Shop Rite, etc. One day we talked about the new people we see on the street or we pass in a parking lot who say hello. I noticed that we didn’t say hello to everybody and vice versa. I asked why we didn’t say hello to everybody, which is my nature. He told me you just know - you can feel it when there’s someone who wants to say hello. I learned that some people’s hearts are open to it and others – maybe not so much.

Frank was one of those people for me. For years, we simply said hello and smiled. Once we spoke, it was easy and satisfying. I could feel the love he had for me; and I’m so grateful to have known him. Our relationship was simple and lovely. I will miss saying hello to Frank.